my cast (again)
9:16 p.m. - 2006-10-31

This might help with all the nicknames I give everyone. If you still are baffled, let me know. But, I hope this clears things up.

KS—my fiancé. It stands for K@huna Shawn. We met at K@huna (a bar near where I live). If you look back at an entry entitled the dating pool it shows when we first met and how it all started. We have our good times, and our bad, but he always finds ways to keep me right here waiting. He’s my best friend. I couldn’t have asked the angels to send me down someone more wonderful. He came into my life when I needed him the most. He’s been a true blessing in most things in my life. He’s my support, my heart, and I’m thankful to have him.

CQ—cooki3 or formerly known as Queeni3. I’ve decided to change her name up b/c I’m scared to death of her finding this. Both are common names (the first one is from her my sp@ce account, and the other one a mutual friend gave her. We’ve known each other since high school. We didn’t like each other at first, but as the years have gone by, we’ve grown a lot closer. Our lives are more similar than we’d ever thought we’d be.

PB—the other Shaun in my life. His nickname is from his screen name. We met through his sister (who was one of my sister’s best friends from high school) in the summer of 1999. We’ve become very close through the years. We attempted at dating, I guess you could call it that. But, things being what they are, bad timing, issues, etc. we never got together. He took me to my first concert, professional football game, pro. ice hockey game. He lives in North Carolina now, but when he comes to town, we get together. It’s always good times. Oh, and he’s the only person in my “real life” that I allow (haha, I allow him) to read my diary.

Batman—the other J in my life. I met him around the same time I met PB. He is the only person on this earth that I can call at any time of the night or day, bawling my eyes out or screaming with joy. He will and always has been there for me through the ROUGHEST times I’ve had in my life. I can tell him anything, and he will listen and give me true advice. He will tell me if I’m being a silly girl, or when I’m smart and strong. He is my shoulder to cry on.

J—a fellow diaryland writer. I found him off some random quiz/survey thing (on d-land), and followed his trail to read his diary. It kept me wanting to read more. Or maybe it was his answers that got me. Anyhoo—I added him, vice versa and here we are today. I’ve never me him in person, but I know if we ever did, I’d get him drunk and take advantage of him (KIDDING), or maybe just throw stuff at him all night. He makes this diary more fun. I like reading his entries (when he does write). He never used to comment or say anything. He was just the strong, silent type on here, but recently (good for me) he’s been commenting and writing about my entries (which I LOVE).

Zootie Tootie/Z—My badbadzoot. She is another diaryland writer. I found her through another diary I read. It’s nice to have her around. She ALWAYS comments, and puts a smile on my face. She’s my long lost sister, friends, confidante that I’m so lucky that she’s here.

SJ—soccer Jen. Her name is Jen, I know her from playing soccer. Again, to keep it hidden, we’ll call her SJ. I don’t have much to report on her (yet). So, that’s that.

Kelbel—was my best friend through most of my life. Some events have caused us to not be as close. I’ve done things to her, she’s done things to me, and we’ve become estranged through the past oh let’s say 3 years. She has two kids, and is engaged. It’s funny; I’d think that we’d be closer now that our lives are somewhat similar. You know, planning your wedding with your best friend? Well, yeah that’s not happening. She lives down the beach (an hour away), which is no excuse cause throughout our friendship we’ve not gone to the same schools, or lived by each other. Instead, we found ways to keep our friendship alive. Maybe someday we’ll get closer. I doubt that, mainly because just like CQ, she cannot be trusted.

3mom---Is a new addition. We were friends throughout high school, and lost touch after she got married. Well, even before that. We were closer near the end of high school, and into our teen years. After I came home from school in NC, she found a husband, and has 3 kids (hence the nickname 3mom). I’m glad we’ve gotten back in touch (she found me on cl@ssm@tes dot com) and she now works in the office with me. I’m glad we’re friends again. Of all my hs friends, I’d say she’s the only one I could tell anything to…and have.

BB—baseball boy, is a guy I met through coaching. We had an instant connection, but never followed through with anything. We’re very similar in our lives, senses of humor, etc. he’s been a nice guy through the years. He’s congratulated me when I’ve moved on in coaching jobs. We talk here and there that’s why he’s randomly in here. I don’t’ think we could hang out on a casual basis because there’s an attraction between us that’s just bound to cause trouble. If I were single, I’d probably look BB up. But, he was too caught up (or so he said) in his life before that he didn’t want to take time out to see what could happen. Sure, we were young and he felt not ready for someone like me. But, I say, if I wasn’t enough for you then, you’re never enough for me ever. Just how I am. If I wasn’t worth it before, then you weren’t “that” into me. I won’t subject myself to someone just learning to accept/whatever to liking me.

Bigg—the man of my life for so long. I can’t go a week without thinking of him. There’s always a song I hear, or a yellow jeep I see and it brings me back to thinking about us. I don’t know what I can say about him. He was my ex boyfriend. We only dated for 8 months (on and off) but talked for about 3 years. I met him @ my work. We struggled back and forth placing blame on each other for why we broke up. We couldn’t get back together b/c I didn’t feel he was mature enough, and he felt the same about me. There is no doubt we cared about each other a lot. But, if we could ever get along for longer than a few weeks, it was a blessing. And that’s no way to have a relationship. When I first met KS and became involved, bigg tried to work things out, but in my opinion it was too late. He had missed his boat, and he agreed. He hung around for a WHILE, but I didn’t see it worth the jump. When I got engaged, he decided not to talk to me anymore. I respect that, and still miss him. I don’t know why, but I do.